It pains me to think about, 39 years later. For my 14th birthday some friends got me a bottle of -- wait for it -- Boone's Farm Apple Wine. You know, the good stuff, with the fine light green bottle and the screw cap. I hid it from my parents and carried it up to my room that night. Not knowing anything about how you go about drinking wine, I waited until everybody had gone to bed, unscrewed the cap, and, well, I wouldn't say I chugged it, exactly, but I did drink it down pretty quickly.
I remember feeling a bit giddy for a short time, and then I don't remember anything at all, except for waking briefly to barf all over my bed and pillow and floor, followed by my mom entering my room, followed shortly thereafter by a horrified gasp.
To my parents credit, they figured I had suffered enough -- and indeed the next morning I suffered -- so never punished me or read me the riot act or anything. They just made sure I understood that what I had done was pretty stupid.
And I never had Boone's Farm Apple Wine again.
So, when was the first time you got drunk? Or do you not even remember?